Before I start the article I would like to cheer you up!!
You are worth more than you can ever realize. You do not need validation of any sort from anyone because no one is qualified enough to judge or validate you. There can only be one person to judge you – the GOD. One more interesting thing you will love to know is that God is non-judgmental. That means he loves every individual being equally whether it be rich or poor, intelligent or dumb, beautiful or ugly, worthy or un-worthy, good or bad, introverted or extroverted, tall or short, big or small, animals or humans, birds or insects, everything is in him and he is everything. So why to worry if someone doesn’t like you or if you do not fit into someone’s “validation-model”
All you have to do is love yourself and accept yourself as you are a 100%. Not 99.99% – that’s incomplete. Love yourself the way you will love the person you love. There should be not compromise in this. You are worthy of your self love. The person who loves himself, accepts himself and respect himself, will gains love, acceptance and respect from others.
A man is made by his belief. As he believes, so he is. – The Bhagavad Gita
Do not think of yourself unworthy or talk trash about yourself to yourself and even others. Stop overthinking small things, this creates frustration, irritation, stress, anxiety, confusion and shitty life. Move out of your head. Forgive yourself first to be forgiven by others.
I will try to explain you the root cause of depression in one sentence. The source of depression may be different for everyone but the root cause remains the same. If you understand this and try to take actions positively to cure this “temporary illness” depression will never be visible to you in this world – nor in the world to come. Alright! so here it goes..
“Depression is imbalanced emotional state of mind created by the person who is depressed due to severe breakdown of confidence and self esteem by external environment because the person is unable to perform as per the expectations of the selfish society.”
You may feel depressed for many reasons, for me it was – lack of love & acceptance. I was craving for validation and to “fit in.” People (mostly your closed ones) will tear you apart, beat the shit out of you, belittle you, ignore you, hate you and disrespect you like shit. And this all has happened with me, I understand how bad (super bad) it feels to be with such kind of people around.
A practical checklist for curing depression based on personal experience. 100% results guaranteed. Before I tell you what to do, let me tell you what not to do, so that you get a wider and more clear perspective.
What you need to stop doing:
- Stop mentally abusing yourself:
- Bad, low and harsh self talk. – come on! you are worth more than any person on this world. Need a proof? Think about things you can do so amazing that other people cannot even think about. I know in this stage it is even harder to think about this one quality you have, but remember the rule – it is the constant repetition of the positive thoughts over the negative thoughts to break your worthless thinking habit.
Let me tell you a real story – There are some tribes in the African region where they do not cut or burn the tress that come across there way, Instead they form a circle around the tree and start talking bad about the tree. They curse the tree to such an extent that the tree dies due to receiving so much of bad energy and feelings of hatred towards it.
So stop talking trash about yourself, you are killing yourself from inside. You need love and not hatred.
- Stop physically abusing yourself:
- Beating yourself, not eating enough food, not sleeping, etc. – Stop slapping and smashing yourself for stupid little mistakes or because of someone’s stupid comment. People are stupid, if they weren’t they would look the situation from your perspective, understand you and be supportive rather than demotivating you. Depress, Anger and Hatred (with all other +ve & -ve emotions) and created and destroyed by your mind in your mind. External circumstances and situations are just stimulants and triggers that come to test you and smash the shit out of you if you are not strong enough. You deserve luxury, comfort and compassion. Do not be rough on yourself, treat yourself right, you are a super delicate and beautiful piece the creation of god, handle with extreme care. Eat right, Exercise, Play, Travel and Love. Leave your head and move into your body (the subconscious mind) which is always n present moment, because this is where the happiness exists, the Present!
Okay, If you are still with me I think you will come out of depression in next 1 week or less. People will start falling in love with you, you will become irresistible – a high quality human being!
Things to do – everyday.
- Visualize yourself becoming better and the best – Our mind does not know the difference between visualization (imagination) and reality that is why our dreams appear so real. Close your eyes, take deep breaths, play soft music and visualize. Feel that you are super happy. You have big ambitious goals and you are working your ass off to achieve them and you are enjoying the journey. Feel people are appreciating you for being yourself, for your happiness. People have started loving you, respecting you, accepting you and appreciating you. The clear the picture, the better it will be.. I have linked down a video that will help you to visualize more clearly and efficiently. wih a little practice you will become a master. Focus on the details. Search the internet for various guided visualizations for instance, loving guided visualization, confidence guided visualization, etc. Visualization – A Powerful Technique For Reprogramming Your Subconscious Mind
- Finding your life purpose and setting ambitious goals – Have something to do in your life. Have dreams and work hard to achieve them. Live your dream life – which if full of love, money and respect. Don’t just think about it or soon you’ll go in depression if you do not achieve it. Radical Action is the formula. Work more than you think.
- Focus on positive rather than negative – Your mind is everything. It is a scientific fact that the shape of the cells inside your brain changes as your thoughts change. whatever you think turns into your reality. Think Big, Think Smart and Think Positive. Focus on the positive side of everything with a cool state of mind. This is where the peace of mind comes from – keep a watch on your thoughts.
- Connect with uplifting and inspiring people – “Encourage me, Motivate me, Uplift me or get the fuck out of my life” The more you connect the more your learn. connect with different types of people, who are inspiring you to be happy, successful and a amazing being.
- Ignore who hates you, appreciate who loves you – You need to accept the fact that everyone is different and so is their likes and dislikes. If you want to stay motivated and happy you have to learn to ignore people who always belittle you, demotivate you and suck the life out of you. Appreciate and be with those who always support you.
- Keep a journal to empty your mind on paper – When in depression, it is natural to overthink small things which destroys you peace of mind. further it may cause insomnia, higher stress levels and bad health. Keep a journal and write anything and everything on your mind, empty your mind totally on paper, you need to let the emotion i.e. the energy in motion flow. The more the energy blockage, the more you will suffer. Alternatively you can also talk to a close friend, brother, sister or anyone who you think can understand you and accept you.
- Work on your physical appearance to feel good about yourself – Focus on your grooming. Wear clean clothes, spray on your favorite perfume, get a new haircut, workout at home/gym, take care of your skin, drink more water, eat more natural plant based foods, go out in the nature to align yourself to mother nature, laugh more and feel good about yourself.
- Understand human psychology & behavior – Study how human brains work. Understand what people do, when they do, why they do, how they do? understand the working of the brain. Study those people who have changed the world, try to understand how you can strengthen your psychology because your brain in everything.
- Work on your psychology – work on your personal development, have a positive approach to change your life, have a will to make the most out of your life because you have come here not just to survive but to thrive. Introspect what makes you better and what brings you down, know who you are, do SWAT analysis, read self help books, do everything that strengthens your mental ability and make you a better person. Do it!
- Do what makes you feel satisfied, happy, at peace and fulfilled – practice your hobbies. Paint, dance, create, sing, play instruments, socialize more, focus on doing things that are energy increasing and not energy sucking.
- Develop productive and energetic routines and habits – Make your daily rituals. look at the most successful people all around the world and you will see in common, they have morning rituals or what tony robins calls it “hour of power”. The idea is to give yourself some time, everyday, first thing in the morning so that you have stable emotional state of mind, a plan to act upon that will bring you closer to your goal and a sense of direction in your life.
- Forgive people and do not take them seriously – Well, you know the importance of forgiving people, but you don’t feel like doing it or even if you feel so you are unable to do, because you cannot “Let go”. So I have a video linked below that will help you get off this problem in 17 minutes. check out the video here – How To Forgive Someone – The One Trick That Makes Forgiveness Easy
- Love Yourself, Accept Yourself, Respect Yourself a 100% – Because all you have got is – 1 life, to live and not to die. This is the most important of all. Please tell me, is anyone loving you? maybe No! So why don’t you love yourself like no one has ever done in the history of this planet. Please for god sake, love yourself because you are worth more than you think.
Get up! Go out in the sun! Cheer up! live your life they way you want and nothing can stop you from becoming the best a man can possibly become.
After all what ever you are doing, can be stated in two words – Self Mastery.
If this article was helpful for you and if you would like to help people who are suffering like you and me, please do share this article. It can change someone’s life – for good.